Last Wednesday I received some shocking news - one of my best friends from high school passed away unexpectedly. I spent the remainder of the week remembering Adam's life and the times we spent together, talking to my high school classmates about our memories of Adam, and grieving with his wife, now a widow at 29, and his family. I was blown away by how many people Adam touched in his short life. He loved God and he loved people and both of those were evident in all that he did.
Death hits us in strange ways. I'm not afraid of death, and because I believe that Adam is with Jesus, and that someday I will be with Jesus, death does not bring a feeling of hopelessness. It does, however, bring great sadness. It also brings a new awareness of life. When someone dies young, and/or unexpectedly, you start to realize how precious every moment of your life is. I found myself thinking "I can't let Charles leave without saying goodbye - because what if this is the last time I see him?" or "This isn't worth fighting about - we should just be grateful that have life and each other" or "What can I do today to make a greater impact on the world I live in?" Seeing how many people Adam reached, and seeing all the things he was passionate about and put his time and effort into, it made me think about my life. Death always makes us think about our lives. I thought about my life a lot when Granda died. But this was a little different - because Adam was young and had a shorter amount of time to make his impact. But he did.
I am so grateful for his life and his friendship and I will always cherish the memories I had of him.
- Spewing strawberry milk all over the dashboard of his car and then spending weeks trying to get out the sour milk smell.
- Singing the Gaither Vocal band at the top of our lungs. (He loved the music, I just loved to sing.)
- Being in drama club together. (Chick and Fats)
- Trips to Tom Wahls, Georges and the movies.
- Going to the Jr/Sr banquet together our Junior year, and then him going with me to my talent competition and playing putt putt golf afterward in my parents living room and getting "tipsy" on sparking grape juice.
With the beginning of Lent today, my reflections are also on life and death: the death of Jesus, my own struggle with being dead to sin, seeing the consequences of sin and the stain it leaves on our lives. Lent is a time of repentance, fasting and preparation for the coming of Easter. However, I've learned that you can't think about death without thinking about life: a life free of sin, the resurrection of Jesus, our own upcoming resurrection and eternal life.
I spent two hours in Starbucks on Sunday, talking to the parent of a University of Rochester student. We talked about UR, higher education in general, life, parenting, and eventually came around to religion. This parent was studying mysticism and had very interesting views on self, right and wrong, etc. The more he talked about mysticism, the more grateful I became that I am a Christian - and I don't mean that with any maliciousness to what he was saying. I respect him and his belief system. But everything he said was centered on Self. I can't imagine the pressure of everything being Me. Because I KNOW that I am going to screw up. I've done it in the past and I'm sure I'll make mistakes in the future. But what I understand that this parent did not is grace. And that is the difference between true and eternal death and life.
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound the saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see.
When we've been there ten thousand years bright shining as the sun
We've no less days to sing God's praise then we first begun
